Got that internship in Massachusetts. I will be moving there at the end of May most likely, I still haven’t figured that part out yet… I am excited, I feel like I am just going to sit around waiting to move. I will probably try and pack as much big city fun in as I can before I leave. I will miss my people here.

This weekends guests included Peter Heffner and Darren Finnigan. We had a swell time that included drinking beer, talking, riding in cabs, eating, and shopping.

the cute show was last night. I think it was a moderate success, as a show everything had a graphic nature to it, and seemed to work well together. I think over a 100 people were there in all, mostly art kids who don’t buy art. I got a lot of compliments and many were puzzled.

KU basketball is out of control.

I am excited to go back to Kansas next weekend. I will see the folks and go to the mega-event called KALLIDE Tell all of the Lawerence area people you know to go. It is Monday, April 14 at the Granada, starting at 10pm. I designed the web site! I just realized that I won’t be able to post the weekly column next week though as I don’t get back until Tuesday night.

Not sure what else to write about, I am exhausted… here is what I typed in my jounal last week:

31 Mar 2003
No big revelations in the past couple of days. My mom visited over the weekend and it was nice. I got to show her around, the bus and train were a hassle. She is addicted to Diet Coke and wanted to spend money while she was here. Consumption = entertainment. She got some placemats, which I can at least see some use for.

I appeared on some web site and the caption was a “sad, sad boy” I am rather sad looking I guess. I wonder if I will ever be depressed in the future.

Turns out I may spend well over $700 on this little art project of mine. Beginning to doubt it’s value. I could do a lot of other more useful things with that money. I would rather spend it on something that I could easily have a multiple of, like a print. That is the graphic designer mentality, which I like. Hopefully I can sell a couple of these deals and make my money back. I don’t really want to deal with moving them, especially if I go to Mass. I seriously doubt anyone will buy one.

1 Apr 2003
Everything I can do for the cute show is out of my hands at least for now. I am starting to work on the piece for the staff show–unmotivated though — partly because of money. I am forcing myself to do it. Hopefully it will be worth it. My confidence is really lacking right now.

Today I met with the design director for the museum. I dropped off my portfolio for him last week to get his feedback and plant the seed in case a job comes up there. He really liked everything, gave me some good criticism, and lent me the Megg’s design history textbook (he saw the glassy-eyed look when he was dropping names). Then he went into this 30-plus minute monologue about the state of graphic design and how much he doubts it’s purpose, it was pretty interesting and I didn’t have much to add since I am pretty inexperienced compared to him. It was an ego boost to hear that he likes my work, but that was all balanced out when he was talking about how worthless a lot of our efforts are in the end. In regards to that I am wondering what is the best/most worthwhile way to apply my skills.

2 Apr 2003
Huge drop in confidence today. Felt like I wasted almost the entire day, mainly because I tried to take advice that I didn’t believe in or understand. I nearly always regret the outcome when I don’t trust my gut feeling, be it design or life decisions. As far as design goes I am becoming a bit of a style-whore, relying on the same old tricks for my work. I don’t know what I need to do to fix this.

Very anxious about the Massachusetts internship. I think I am just going to intern for the rest of my life. No money — no worries. I am also anxious about this weekend. I have one goal for the art show–don’t look like an idiot. I think I will achieve this goal by not getting drunk and smiling a lot.